Often in our Marriage and Relationship Life Coaching sessions we meet with couples who have been married only a few years. However, from time to time we have couples who have been together for many years. For these couples, they often report they feel like they are living with their sibling. It isn’t usually anything huge that derailed their marriage rather a lack of demonstrations of love each day. As you know I often say, “If the grass looks greener in your neighbors yard, water your own grass.” Often times after years of living with someone you get so accustomed to their ways and thoughts that life can become routine. This is often the downfall of many marriages.
What to do???? The best answer truly comes from the past. When you first met your husband, what did you do? When you first started pursuing him, my guess is you left no stone unturned in your effort to get his attention and demonstrate your love for him. Well, sometimes going back to the basics is the best idea. To revive the romance in your marriage, why not try some of the wonderful things you did in the early days. Here are few suggestions that might be helpful in jogging your memory.
- Leave sweet notes of love for him to find in his car in the morning.
- Send him off in the morning with a PASSIONATE kiss. (This is two-fold, it starts his day of right and reminds him why he wants to come home at night)
- Meet him for a surprise lunch.
- Send him sexy text messages during the work day.
- Make sure your hair and clothes look as good today as they did when you were dating him.
- Put chocolates on his pillow in the evening with a love note.
- Flirt with him from across the room.
- Surprise him by greeting him while wearing his favorite color of lipstick and perfume.
- Plan a date to somewhere you went when you were dating.
- Recreate your favorite things to do when you were dating.
- If he played sports take him to the ball field or court where he played and remind him how much you loved watching him play. Talk about that big play or shot he made. Let him know you still remember.
Be creative, you will find wonderful ways to spice up the romance in your marriage, no matter how many years it’s been since you first met.
For those of you who are newly married, never stop doing the things that won his heart to start with. Years from now you will be so glad you did.